Heart to Heart with momma

I had a great heart to heart with my mom today- that has been a long time coming, honestly. I miss my mom and spending time with her!

One of the things we talked about was my brother, Jon David.

Dressed up as "Prince Charming" for Brook's 5th birthday- July 2009

. Jon David came to us as a foster child in May of 2005 when he was 2 ½. He was one of the first children that my parents had after switching to “straight DHR” from the agency.  Life was rough for him before he got to us, genetically speaking and just in general. Pretty soon, we realized that there was more going on in his head than a typical 2 year old. Jon David was diagnosed with ADHD/OCD, then a so-so diagnosis of Bipolar, and finally a diagnosis of PANDAS. Let’s add a sprinkle of trust, bonding and anxiety issues in a preschooler and hope he comes out okay!

Jon David's Last Christmas with us :(

Fast forward to December 2009- Jon David moved out to live with a family member.

Sept 2010- Jon was placed back into care.

Dec 25, 2010- Jon was able to spend Christmas with us and that was the last time we were able to see him.

Feb 2013- My mom sent me a text that said “new kid- Jon”. I was at Shane’s that Friday night, getting ready to meet my grandparents so we could celebrate Valentine’s Day. My first thought was “this is my Jon David.” I just knew. I called my mom and all I heard was “It is Jon David…” before I lost it and started crying. My mother had received a phone call from a lady and asked if we would like to see him and be involved in his life again. Mom didn’t have a lot of details right off the bat and I pestered the crap out of my mom until the lady called back. My parents got to see him the following weekend and just getting that quick picture through a text made my day!

March 2013- I had to go home for spring break to see him. Yes, I was excited to see my other siblings but this was someone I had not seen in almost 3 years!

My booger! 

Nov 2013- My wedding is coming up and Jon David won’t be able to be there. It is something I did not even think about when I started planning the wedding. Now that it is closer, I realize that he won’t be able to come. I struggled with how to incorporate him into the wedding. Most things that I saw were for people who passed away. So we just added his name to the bottom of the program under a special section entitled “People who we really wish were there but can’t be”.

I’ll miss my booger on my special day- really really miss him! 

Jon David's 1st trip to Catfish place!!

My FAVORITE picture of us at a game! 

Best friends! 

Randomness at 4:40 in the morning

As I'm sitting here in the parking lot waiting on work to start, I realize that we have less than 4 weeks to go. It kind of snuck up on us. We both have apps on our phones for a countdown and we look at them daily. I cannot believe that  it has been almost a year since Shane proposed. This time last year we were just getting back from visiting my parents and watching my sister perform in a half time show. Looking back it seems that it went by so quickly but it was just a day by day counting down that made it go by so fast. Shane and I have always done countdown to everything . We countdown to him leaving for training, we countdown to him coming home from training, we countdown to our birthdays. I know this post is completely random and thoughts are just everywhere but it's also 440 in the morning and I'm tired from this week of school.  I guess it goes without saying that we're both excited for the wedding. We talked a bunch lately about how the focus in America is always on the wedding itself and not the marriage. When we get married we are making a commitment to ourselves in front of everybody that we're going to stick this out. We were both raised in homes where divorce is not an option and we don't want children to be raised in a home that divorce is an option. We've both seen what divorce can do to our friends- both had friends that have been divorced even at our age. Well off to work for now its going to be a long day!!!

30 days left....

Today is 30 days left. I can honestly say I am super excited and still nervous…. Wait... what????

I was reading an article the other day (I wish I had saved it now) and it was discussing how our culture is wrapped up with the idea of a marriage as “the wedding day and then the rest of the days”. No one seems to be placing the emphasis on “the rest of the days”. When I read that article, it bothered me. What was I doing stressing over this ONE day? I need to focus on making sure my “rest of the days” are better than that one day. I realize we are going to have ups and downs… that is life. I want to use that “one day” as a best day in my marriage and start it out right!  

I am spending the last days as a single woman… dreaming about how amazing and awesome my marriage is going to be! 

32 days left

32 days left….I can't believe it is almost here!!!! 

Shane and I have 32 days left until the wedding and things are quickly coming. We were just given a bridal shower (“I do Bar-B-que”) this past weekend by my Aunt Paula and cousins Dana and Debra. They worked super hard and long to make that day special for Shane and me. It was outdoors with tables, shade, and plenty of sunflowers all around. Our family loves to eat and it was evident Saturday with all the yummy food.

We only have a few things left on our “to do list” and now that school is underway fully, it is catching up quick! Here is just a quick list of my typical homework load:

Parasitology- quick quizzes in chapter, quizzes at end of chapter, cheat sheet page (individual page for each parasite), and working on paper

Immunohematology: quizzes at end of chapter, rewrite notes

Clinical Microbiology: reread the chapters and study the charts

Clinical Chemistry: rewrite the chapters and work on chemical structures.

Ekk I know!!!!!

Off to work on more homework….